I am having a sad fertility day today. It's been awhile since I had one, so I guess I'm due.
I have no idea what brought it on, but it's one of those days where I stare with shameless envy at every pregnant woman I see - especially those with toddlers - I read the pregnancy boards of all my websites - which normally I know better and avoid like the plague - and I feel pretty negative in general about ever being able to experience pregnancy again.
Probably doesn't help that Jenna is turning 3 next month and I'm making a photobook for her on Shutterfly, so I've been looking at baby pictures for the last 3 days straight.
It's just not fucking fair. That's all. What the HELL do I have to do to get a baby around here?? Is there really something so drastically wrong with me or Steve that we don't deserve to be parents again? I mean, seriously.
ok - in all honesty, I think the main issue is that IVF is getting close now and I'm getting nervous.....
I need to figure out a way to deal. Must go order those Anji CDs....
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