Waiting

The spotting has increased. It's enough now to where it's dripping out after I pee -- sorry for the major TMI---, but still not staining my underwear. I called my midwife and am waiting for a return call. I also called Steve, and of course he thinks I'm crazy for calling. It's almost like I just need to hear her say out loud what I know she's going to say -- that I can come in for labs to check HCG levels, or I can wait it out for another week or two until I could get an accurate ultrasound and just monitor my symptoms and go to the ER if I start bleeding heavily or in severe pain.

At this point, I almost just want it to be over. I'd rather know on Wednesday that my numbers are dropping than wait any longer. I feel bad that my thoughts have gone so pessimistic - but that's where I'm at.