....and then blatantly ignore their advice?
I was told yesterday that there is nothing of clinical significance wrong with me despite my 2+ weeks of continuous spotting for the last 2 cycles.
I don't believe that.
I think my recently developed fibroid is the culprit -- as it appeared right after my d&c, I've never had one before, and I've never had this kind of spotting before. (ok, yes, I've spotted before - but not for this extended period of time).
I told the doctor this - and I thinkl he wanted to laugh at me. He said a 2.6cm fibroid is not going to cause this kind of symptom in any woman.
I don't believe him.
He wrote me out scripts for prometrium - to force a withdrawal bleed 10 days from now - and antibiotics - in case of infection.
I don't want to take either of them.
He suggested the next thing to do would be an endometrial biopsy to determine if my endometrium is out of phase and causing the irregular bleeding.
I don't want to do that either.
I did the exact same thing last week when I went to the naturopath. I left her office with an $80 bill and two bottles of tinctures with instructions to use them twice a day.
Haven't opened either bottle.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
It's like I'm addicted to "finding out information" but don't want to take any action. What am I hoping to hear? Why do I second guess the professionals? I'm pretty concerned about this seemingly repeating pattern in myself. It seems pretty unhealthy and unproductive - not to mention fairly costly. Clearly I need to take a look at it.
I was reading in my Christine Northrup bible (aka Women's Bodies Women's Wisdom) last night about fibroids. She has a lengthy chapter on the subject that includes a great deal of information about the mind-body connection between fibroids and being otherwise "stuck" on something in your life. Well, I'd be hard-pressed to think of better fitting adjective that "stuck" to define my life the last 4 years. And while I am a theoretical believer in holistic health for sure, I have a harder time following through on the suggested non-medical treatments, mostly because they tend to be time-consuming, expensive and usually don't produce results until months or even years down the line. Throughout the last 4 years I have tried several treatments that fall into this category -- acupuncture, Chinese herbs, talk therapy, yoga and mindfulness meditation to name a few. But I always quit after a few months because I run out of money or I get impatient.
I think I've convinced myself this morning to go ahead with the Prometrium/antibiotic combo, as it's really pretty harmless and can't hurt anything -- other than messing with my ready-to-ovulate-in-48-hours right ovary shown on the sono screen yesterday - but I'm not TTC anyway, right?
5 comments:
Perhaps it just suggests that you've lost some faith in all of these "treatments?" It's hard to keep doing things that are producing no results. Maybe you could give your body a few more weeks to get back on track and then do the recommended treatment. ((hug))
Wow.
I could have written this post myself.
((HUGS))
Ugh. I'm sorry. I feel much the same way. I hate listening to advice that doesn't make sense. I don't think my spotting is normal, either. Unfortunately, it seems to be something that no one understands. Since they don't know why, they just say it's normal.
I'd try one of the two options presented... see what happens. Likely won't hurt, might help... I get the running out of money, too... GAH!
It's SO frustrating when the "answers" we receive don't match what we feel is "wrong" or "right" with our bodies. Hang in there!
I too am coming up on four years of this hell. You're not crazy, it's really really hard. Hang in there.
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